What I Learned From Being a Foster Parent

After seven years of being a licensed foster family we are not renewing our foster care license this year. Fostering was something we kind of fell into.  It’s not something we worked toward for a long time or talked about extensively.  It felt absolutely right from the first moment we began to discuss it.  And, as Jason and I are […]

Reposted: A Rant

This post was orginally published in 2009, just after we finalized Ethan’s adoption. We’re experiencing this conversation a lot right now so I wanted to share it again. A Rant… I’m feeling the need to vent about something and hope you won’t mind. I am generally not easily offended, but there is a scenario that happens to us fairly frequently […]

Dear Elijah

Dear Elijah, Baby boy, I want to remember every detail of this week.  After so many difficulties in getting you here, after setbacks and heartbreaks and disappointments, we are finally done.  You are officially ours!  It feels like you’ve been with us all along now; funny how that works.  It’s hard to imagine our lives without your huge grin, your […]


As we are drawing closer to finalizing Elijah’s adoption (just 22 days now!) my mind has been flooded with memories of the other times in my life when I’ve felt so lucky. We didn’t know it at the time, but having a biological child should not have been able to happen for us. Logically and medically speaking, that is. Knowing […]

Hidden Hearts

I have somewhat of an obsession with hidden hearts.  It began when I was a child and my room was decorated with millions of tiny multi-colored hearts.  And I mean millions.  Tiny hearts in a multitude of colors on the wallpaper, larger hearts all over my bedding.  It was an 80s heart-fest, I tell you. As an adult, I have […]

Knit Together

During the weeks leading up to Elijah’s birth I was terrified the adoption would fall through, for good reason (and another and another).  I wanted to make something for the baby but was anxious to start, in case we lost him. I needed something easy, something that I wouldn’t have to think about or which could potentially add more frusration to my […]

Wonderfully, Beautifully, Messily Blessed

As I mentioned earlier (here, here and here) the past few months have been difficult for me.   It’s been hard to see the beautiful things in my life as I have felt so worn-down with our current challenges. And really there are so, so many beautiful things.   Besides being a bit discouraged, our time has been spent on so […]

Hanging On

This summer has been pretty rough on our family.  I’ve been feeling discouraged and it’s taken me until just the past couple of weeks to feel like myself again. All summer long I’ve had an image in my mind, a thought of reassurance that might make sense only to me.  But I feel like I should share it with you, […]


My amazing Mama wrote a poem after our heartbreak last week.  We read it for the first time last night and Jason and I both cried.  Not hard to believe, I know.  This was not the sobbing-so-hard-we-can’t-breathe crying we did for the first couple of days after our failed adoption, though.  It was more of the tears-running-down-our-cheeks-and-our-hearts-still-hurt-but-we’re-slowly-moving-on type crying. Progress. […]